My Beef with the TNIV

I just couldn't believe it when I saw it. How could the TNIV do this? Could any honest person with a knowledge of Greek actually justify this unwarranted tampering with the text?

OK, OK, I'm being a little silly here. But I really wish that the TNIV would simply put brackets around contested passages like the ending of Mark, and the story of the woman caught in adultery. Now, they've put the entire passages into italics, and this is NOT good news for this lil lady's eyes.

Away with the italics!

Pigma Micron---Perfect Bible/Moleskine Pen

Isn't it perfectly hideous and marvelous at the same time? I picked up a Pigma Micron yesterday, size 03, and have been perfectly thrilled with it. I've used it in my fire engine red TNIV, and despite the fact that the paper is very thin (to keep the Bible under an inch thick) there has been NO bleed through. Yes, there's 'ghosting'--you can see it on the other side, but no ugly blotches, or anything. I expect it would be even better with higher quality paper.

It writes very smoothly, giving you the sensation of writing with an ordinary gel or Pilot pen (I call them "inky pens" although that is perfectly idiotic, considering that every pen is inky) without any of those sudden, uncomfortable scratchy feelings, or blots on your finger-tips. Although, since this gives me a delightfully self satisfied feeling (the ink blots) I may pick up my spluttery Pilot once in awhile.

It looks exactly like the type of pen that will last FOREVER. I certainly hope that it shall. (It writes very well in a Moleskine, by the way, it's pure, smooth, ecstasy.)

One Buck Short--or, Buying God

Three times today, someone was just one buck short.

I put back the packet of pens, too impatient to take the time to pick up the extra dollar that I needed.

I tapped my foot as I waited to purchase my one pen, and watched the man ahead of me deal ot a handfull of wrinkled tens and fives.

"Just one more," said the cashier pleasantly.

He put down a wrinkled one.

My friend came from the store, frustration written over her face. She held an unpaid bill in one hand.

"You dropped a dollar when I gave you that envelope to hold," she said "Give me a dollar."

I pulled a crushed dollar from my pocket, and handed it over.

Naturally, fiendish person that I am, I had to cannabalize a series of concidences to make an interesting blog post, but at least I admit my guilt.

I picked up a brilliantly red TNIV today, and my pen was a Pigma Micron, sacred pen, at least according to many people. It is a beautiful Bible, and it will certainly shine among the dignified navys, burgundies, powdered blues, dull gold and browns of my Bible collection. However, as I rummaged about for my Borders card, I questioned myself.

Was I searching for some Holy Grail Bible, some magically perfect volume---was I buying a Bible, or buying God? Or, buying my way to God? Buying some experience---"as the Borders register rings, a deep God experience from heaven springs?"

I don't just buy God through Bibles. Sometimes, I buy God through Bible study. When I turn over the pages of my wide margin Bible, and the colourful notations speak of my smug, self-serving Bible study, I fairly scream to myself "Wow! You've really bought God this time---look at that hard work!"

It's much easier for me to buy God than to speak with God. Because then, he's a person, and I'm too impatient to deal with people.

But I have a problem. I have to buy God every day. If I didn't...I'd come up short. I'd lose everything that I'd been working for. My god feeling, my self-righteousness. I'm pretty sure that's what Philippians 3 is about. I'm not quite as plain as Paul is, it's hard for me to grasp what it's about when I figure out that my self-righteousness doesn't mean anything. So, I come to God, and say this:

"Father, I know that I can't earn you. But I still try. In fact, I feel self-righteous when I tell you all of this. I feel smug that I realize that I'm hopeless. I feel smug that I admit my smugness. It pretty much ends up being a big advert for me, me, me. I'm sorry. Forgive. Help me. Really, really help me. Thanks for listening to lame prayers."

Faith is believing that.

Thank God for Priscilla!

"We're shocked, really."

The TNIV committee last week issued a statement, defending their inclusion of the story of Priscilla, found in Acts 18:25-27, in which Priscilla and her husband took aside a young preacher, Apolles, and instructed him further about the gospel.

"It's not a passage contested by anyone," one translator complained "It seems to be part of a larger attack concentrated on the TNIV. This is irrational."

However, Wayne Grudem, in his recent article on the subject, stated that "It's a clear example of feminism biasing the work of the translators. The Bible clearly says that a woman isn't supposed to teach a man. Therefore, without any manuscript evidence, I'm declaring this passage a spurious inclusion by early feminists attempting to enlarge the God given role of women---to support, affirm, and encourage the leadership of men. I'm sure that the evidence will turn up someday. Meanwhile, the TNIV is lending support to a radical feminine agenda by giving credence to this---this screed!"

opinion-minion

Note: Although it has been rumored that future editions of the ESV will omit this passage, it has not yet been confirmed by Crossway or Wayne Grudem, whose fans are now advancing upon a certain blog writer